Friday, December 17, 2010

I am at a crossroads........


This week has been a blur. It's finals week for the kids, then they are home for three weeks.  It has not been a good semster for anybody and my house has been in chaos because my children believe I am overreacting to poor grades. I have a migraine that will not go away. I wake up and there it is, mocking me. I take advil and still there. When I finally get to bed, my head feela as though it is going to explode. Two weeks of pain. It's Christmas and this year is a gift card year, my kids are older and only want money anyway. But then I find out my seventh grader still believes in Santa Claus. I don't know what to do. There is no extra money for Santa Claus. I start school January 3rd. I am very nervous because I have math, english lit, speech, health and fitness, and government. Real classes. We are a one income family but really should be a two income family, as I am not qualified for anything. back to school I go. My mom is having knee replacement surgery on January 10th. I will be going out there on weekends to help her out and Honey will be staying with her for the first week to take care of her (and my dad). I thought school was starting later and I was supposed to stay for a month, but now I can't and that is stressing me out. On top of everything else, we have had Mater since Thanksgiving. which is ok, but I had no clue why. Then this week my daughter tells me that Mater's dad is in rehab (for at least six months - yeah. I think something else is going on but I'm just going to go with rehab.....) and his mother is staying with her to help out with his two other kids, but Mater is too much for that grandma.....so bottom line he is now with us for awhile. Migraine went into overdrive. It hits me - I am already registered for school, I am already letting my mom down, I am already at the end of my rope dealing with hormonal teenagers, my truck is still not working which means we are down to one car.....and now.......but look at that face. I know his is safe with us, I know he has a schedule with us (mom works at BJ's and works all hours), I know there is no other option.
I am so overwhelmed.

6 comments:

  1. Breathe...you have no choice. I hope things get better and easier for you!! That little face is adorable, and he is so lucky to have you and Honey!!
    www.theknitnurd.blogspot.com

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  2. Big sigh honey. You have a lot on your plate so take things one at a time. I hope your Mom's surgery goes well and she has an easy and complete recovery. I hope your headache passes soon-- Perhaps not getting up at the crack of dawn to get kids ready for school or fighting over homework will help? And I'm pretty sure your 7th grader's belief in Santa is just wishful thinking so don't be too hard on yourself.

    Stop, and sit, catch your breath.... xoxoxo jj

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  3. Just take it one day at a time, one problem to fix at a time. And like everyone else said...breathe. {{hugs}}

    And that pic is totally adorable!

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  4. Breathe, and I will keep you in my prayers.. There has been a lot going on here too for me and wowzers! I keep telling myself this to shall pass.

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  5. I know it seemas that the entire world is against you right now... Indeed, breathe and focus on the serenity prayer! God will give you strength, but you must know what you have control over. Everything else will take care of itself! I will pray for your strength :-)

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  6. Wow, that is a lot on your plate. All you can do is take it one day at a time. I know that is easier said than done, once the brain gets going it is hard to turn if off. You are strong and I know you can get through this.
    ::hugs::

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